


Beyond Humanity and Untamed Rage

by Vestina



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, Badass Rey, Drunk Kylo Ren, Eventual Romance, F/M, Hate Sex, Hux needs to get a life, Kylo is a bastard, Stormpilot, They need to work shit out first, forced cohabitation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2016-09-24
Packaged: 2018-06-08 00:17:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 17,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6831163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vestina/pseuds/Vestina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He wasn't supposed to crash land on Ahch-To. She wasn't supposed to offer a temporary truce. He definitely wasn't supposed to have to choose between sleeping with her and killing her. Post TFA. Reylo.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I'm finally back and writing! It's been awhile, but summer means I (might) actually have time to write! This fic is definitely rated M, so be warned. At the beginning of each chapter I will give a song recommendation that I listened to while writing the chapter. I’m really excited about this fic. Reylo is such an interesting pairing. Anyway, enjoy, and review with any thoughts or questions!
> 
> Song recommendation: "Human," Chrsitina Perri

" _Come to me._ "

Ren freezes mid-sentence as the order reverberates through him. He gives the expectantly staring Stormtrooper captain a pointed look, and the man hurriedly departs.

" _Of course master_ ," Ren replies.

* * *

"Master Luke!" Rey calls, trembling under the weight of her levitating boulders.

" _Use Force speak, padawan_."

She grits her teeth and pushes her thoughts toward him. " _I can't hold this much longer_."

" _Draw strength from within, young padawan_."

* * *

 

He has an acute distaste for General Hux. The man has both the appearance and demeanor of a garbage rat. (Incidentally, those awful rodents are the principle reason he will never return to Tatooine.)

"Master Ren," Hux all but sneers.

"Greetings," Ren responds, pointedly directing his gaze forward, and not in the direction of the general.

"The Supreme Leader called upon you too, it seems."

"Indeed."

Hux appears to have no response to this. They both stand at attention, awaiting the Supreme Leader.

* * *

 

She used to hate meditating.

They spend hours sitting on stiff ground dissolving from the world. Submitting to the Force.

For the first several months, she struggled considerably. She convinced herself that her senses had grown too attuned. That years in the desert, fending for herself, alert on constant watch for bounty hunters, has made it impossible to descend into her mind.

She could tell it frustrated Luke, even if he never spoke the words aloud. His thoughts were harsher against hers as he demanded she listen to the Force, perhaps oblivious to the irony of forced meditation.

So instead of eliminating her thoughts, she tries to focus on everything, letting it all in, seeing the vibrations and reverberations of the Force in everything, and refuses to decipher the important parts.

Luke isn't particularly fond of her method.

But she doesn't hate meditation any more.

* * *

 

In agitated anticipation of Snoke’s arrival, Ren clenches his fists under the sleeves of his cloak (so that Hux cannot see his weakness).

The seconds tick by. An obvious power play by Snoke to keep them waiting.

Hux shifts awkwardly, clearing his throat in a too-obvious attempt to clear the silence from the room.

He fucking hates Hux.

The blue light of the projector flickers, and the large, bulbous head of the Supreme Leader shutters into focus.

“Greetings,” growls Snoke’s distinctive voice, deep and harsh like sandpaper.

“Greetings, Supreme Leader,” Ren responds, not daring to tilt his chin upward to meet the master’s gaze. He’s been chastised for insolence before. But he senses Snoke’s approval in the Force signature that faintly emanates from the projection.

“Greetings,” Hux announces, clearly anxious that his inability to control the Force will leave him forgotten. “What would you have us do, Master?”

* * *

 

She’s boiling water to cook the spongy roots they grow on Ahch-To when Luke enters her small cabin. (His place sits three ridges away, a difficult journey by foot.)

“Hello,” she says when he sits at her table.

“ _Force-speak, young one_.”

She purses her lips, and sets in front of him a bowl of red berries she picked earlier that morning. “ _Of course, Master._ ”

“ _I sense your frustration, padawan. The way of the Force does not promise ease. You must be dedicated to your efforts.”_

“ _Yes,_ _Master_ _Luke_. _I_ _will_ _try_ _harder_.”

* * *

 

“General Hux, you will henceforth assume the role of commander of this vessel while Ren is off ship. Please inform all necessary personnel, and report to Deck C.”

“Of course, Supreme Leader. Thank you for this great honor. I promise to serve the First Order as an effective leader.”

Ren has trouble restrain the, “ _Fuck off, Hux_ ,” bubbling in his throat. The smug bastard sends a smirk his way before strutting out.

His insides squeeze at what could happen next. He doesn’t like the idea of leaving the _Finalizer_ long enough not to be its commander.

He turns his head upward to gauge Snoke. “Where will you have me go, Supreme Leader?”

“You need to finish what you started; find the scavenger girl, acquire the location of the Jedi Temple, and eliminate the threat she poses to the First Order.”

“And how will I find her?”

Snoke glowers down at him. “I am extremely disappointed in you, Ren. That you did not have the sense to track her Force signature after your encounter shows your lack of foresight. Perhaps you are not prepared to complete this mission. Perhaps I should call upon another of my apprentices.”

He clenches his fists again under his cloak, willing his anger and embarrassment to subside. (He tries to block out how this embodies the Jedi principles he learned from Luke.) In a measured voice he responds,”Your judgement far precedes mine. If you do not believe me to be competent, I will not go.”

Snoke narrows his eyes, seeming to assess Ren’s quivering form. A long pause before Kylo regains the nerve to speaks again.

“I do indeed know the location of her force signature, but it has grown fainter in the time since I have had contact with her.”

“If you know her location, then you shall be the one to destroy her.”

“Indeed, Master. Thank you for your confidence in me.”

“Ensure that I have not misplaced it.”

* * *

 

She doesn’t think she can do this much longer. Master Luke tasked her to swim out to the farthest island from their mainland, to bring back supplies from their storehouse there.

About twenty minutes in, she momentarily forgets that she can’t inhale cobalt-laced water the way she can air. Her lungs clench as she gasps, uncontrollably trying to expel the water from her lungs. She kicks her legs desperately, propelling her arms so she stays above the surface. Her mind races, and she feels her thoughts bordering on panicked.

“ _Rey, stay calm_ .” Luke’s voice invades her mind, stern and unforgiving. She detects a hint of disappointment too. 

She hates disappointing him. She’s his hope for the next generation of Jedi Masters, and she can’t swim twenty minutes without drowning. It motivates her, the thought that she might let him down, but she often wonders if she’ll ever live up to what Luke hoped for Ben Solo.

She tilts her head back to inhale a bit more oxygen and keeps swimming.

* * *

 

The small fighter jet he takes to Ahch-To is so tiny that his legs cramp beneath the pilot’s seat. He wishes he were not alone on this mission. The hours drag on as he flies through uncharted space.

He can feel her signature growing stronger. He doesn't even need that map from her head. She herself is the map.

All the punishment he endured from Snoke over her escape was for nothing. Snoke digging around in his head, yanking on Ren's insecurities until he was nothing more than a shell of himself.

On his left, the blue planet emerges from the blackness. He wishes he had the _Finalizer_ and could simply evaporate the girl and his old master.

But no. They should suffer for the pain they have caused him.

They should burn and bleed the way he too fucking burns and bleeds every fucking day because of their ignorance.

He prepares the fighter jet for descent.

* * *

 

Her whole body aches. Her strength dwindles at an alarming rate, and she vaguely wonders what would happen if she just stopped.

She tried to awhile back, at the last island, but Luke's voice had pressed insistently into her thoughts, propelling her forward.

She can see the land mass in the distance, but perhaps it's only a mirage. Twilight creeps over the sky, the clouds streaked with purple.

Something catches her eye. Something bright and orange, zipping across the purple like a jagged scar. She stares harder and realizes it's attached to a vessel.

Someone's come for her.

* * *

 

He must have incorrectly entered the calculations, but that doesn't explain why the jet won't calibrate. The atmosphere can't catch him; it's thin, too thin. The fighter cuts through it too quickly. The higher-than-average gravity pulls at him, dragging him closer to the surface. At this speed he'll never make a landing. He knows he can always escape and Force levitate himself to land, but he needs the jet to return to the _Finalizer_.

He desperately flips through the control panel, searching for anything that could slow him down.

The parachute deploys with a loud crack, but he's moving too quickly, and the wind rips right through it. He tries to steady the ship with the Force, imagining the thrusters slowing.

The shuttle lurches, but continues its downward trajectory. “Shit,” he hisses. He attempts again, but the water below approaches rapidly, and the Force won't respond to his panic. The best he can hope is to direct his fall as close to Rey's signature as possible.

But he doesn't even have enough time for that.

* * *

 

The ship will not make a good landing. She knows she should swim out that way, toward it to rescue any survivors, but she can't summon the energy. She can barely tred water and gawk simultaneously.

“ _Go!_ ” comes the voice in her head. This voice doesn't sound like Luke's, but rather like own.

She feels the Force surge inside her, a second wind propelling her across the waves. She tries to reach her arm up to slow the descent of the ship, but her exertion to swim overpowers her efforts.

So she keeps striving forward.

* * *

 

He's going to have to jump. There's no other way out. There will have to be another way off this planet. The jet still free falls, and hell if he'll drown with it. He came to far to end here.

In the back of his mind he can feel the scavenger's presence growing stronger, but he tosses that thought aside, and throws himself from the cockpit in a perfect dive, slicing the waves evenly, his cloak billowing behind him.

The impact with the waves hits his chest so hard it knocks away his breath. He didn't anticipate the searing cold. The water must be near ice. His vision keeps going in and out. Thankfully, his mask keeps the water out of his lungs, but he feels himself fading into the blackness.

* * *

 

She sees a figure jump from the ship, submerge, and then fail to reappear.

“ _Luke!_ ” she calls out, but she gets no response.

The ship hits the water, the impact ricocheting waves in every direction. Caught off guard, it pulls her beneath the surface, the wave crashing over her face. Rey kicks violently, a desperate attempt to find the surface. Her reaching fingers hit cold, and she pulls herself up.

She swims in the direction she thinks she saw the figure fall. Her muscles strain until she sees below her dark billowing robes. She inhales sharply and submerges her head, diving toward the limp form. With all the energy she has left, she grasps the edge of the black fabric and yanks.

And when the shimmer of his mask comes into view, she almost screams. He's haunted her nightmares for weeks now.

She wonders how she'll haul his body to shore without them both drowning.

She contemplates leaving him here.

But she feels Luke's presence in her mind, giving her just enough strength to collapse on the shore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh no... What's going to happen to Rey when Ren wakes up? Is Luke going to continue to pester Rey for eternity? Is Hux going to crash the Finalizer and confirm Kylo's assumption that Hux is incompetent? Find out all this and more when you hit favorite/follow! Reviews expedite the writing process! Tell me your thoughts!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! Thank you all for the wonderful support of the first chapter. I hadn’t anticipated such an enthusiastic response to this story! There’s some early Reylo flickers in this chapter, so enjoy! Review with all your thoughts and comments!
> 
> Chapter song recommendation: “Human” Of Monsters and Men

 

When he opens his eyes, all he can only notice that the light is wrong. It’s soft and dappled and clearly not the harsh blue color of his chamber in the  _ Finalizer _ . His head throbs, a perfect rhythm pounding against his skull.

“You’re awake,” says a voice over his shoulder. “And here I was hoping you were comatose.” A glass is shoved in his face. “Drink this.”

With trembling hands he takes the cup, looking briefly up at the figure who offered it.

Of course it’s her. He should have recognised her signature the second he was conscious. He takes a sip of the water, not trusting his voice. Not trusting himself to take back the upper hand.

She continues to stare at him, her hands on her hips, her expression something between annoyance and boredom. It unnerves him a bit. He goes back to his water.

“Your shit’s okay, in case you were wondering,” she says, breaking the silence. “I was quite hoping that disgusting saber of yours would be too waterlogged to work again, but no.” She lets out a smile that doesn’t make it past her lips. 

“I’m going to kill you, Rey,” he says quite simply. He tries to make it off hand, like it’s just the way thing are.

She looks at him, studying his posture. “You snore in your sleep.”

* * *

 

It scares her how much she hates him.

How much she wants to stab him the way he stabbed Han Solo. 

After hauling his body through the ocean,she had collapsed on the base of the island, coughing up water, and throwing up the watery contents of her stomach next to a withering pine tree. She had gone back to his body and removed the mask to inspect the damage. He hadn’t really anticipated the jagged scar running down his face. Hadn't expected to feel proud of disfiguring him. She let the disgusting helmet roll down the rocks to be pelted by the waves. Without his Force signature pulsing faintly, she would have assumed him dead. She knelt beside him, her hands clenching at the thought of reviving him.

After a few chest compressions, he reanimated, lurching forward and gasping frantically. He rolled away from her, to his stomach on his hands and knees, dry heaving, until he collapsed again. His eyes fluttered shut.

She contemplated killing him. How easy it would be. She felt the rage sweep through her, terrified by its intensity.

Jedi shouldn't feel like this.

“ _ Guide me, Master Luke _ .”

“ _ You do not need my guidance when you know the way _ .”

The only “way” she knew was to the storehouse, and decided that would be the next step.

She had stumbled up the crags of the island, Ren’s body levitating behind her, “accidentally” hitting his head against the side of the jagged cliffs. She only decided to be more careful when blood oozed from his temple.

The storehouse was built in a cave with an entrance near the top of the island’s central peak. She swung it open with her shoulder, and descended the crumbling stone stairs into the cavern below, cursing herself that she didn’t bring a torch. Luke’s blue lightsaber was back with him for fear it would get water logged on the journey over...

She looked back at the floating figure behind her, softly illuminated by the starlight in the open entry way. Took a deep breath, and began rifling through his belt. His robes were still soggy. The sun had dropped hours ago now, and she shivered in her own damp clothes.

Her hand wrapped around the hilt of his saber, and she yanked it from him. 

It shuttered when she turned it on, the crackling energy almost biting her. She made sure to keep her fingers away from the distinctive flaring guards. She raised the blade over her head and descended farther. 

The majority of Luke’s supplies were kept in the base of the mountain. He lived simply, but kept a storehouse of essentials out here. She gathered the few things she needed, tucking them away into her satchel. 

Kylo Ren’s body shifted.

He would probably rouse soon, and it would make this situation a whole lot shittier. She needed to get to the safe house. 

She needed sleep, but suspected that wouldn’t happen any time soon. Not with this monster to deal with.

The safe house connects to the larger store chamber on the opposite side that they had entered. It stuck out the side of the cliffs with a picturesque view of the ocean. 

She dropped Ren on the kitchen table.

And tentatively sat in a chair, waiting for the inevitable.

* * *

 

He sits up groggily on what appears to be a table. He’s in a kitchen, sparse, but functional.

“Where is my saber?” he demands.

“So that you can kill me?” She rolls her eyes at him. Sighs. “Do you want food?”

“No.”

She shrugs at him, and tears into a loaf of bread.

“You have my saber.”

“I told you I did.”

He waves his hand in a arc. “You will bring it to me.”

She continues eating.

Fuck it, he doesn’t need a weapon. Summoning the Force, he leaps off the table and tips her backwards out of the chair. She yelps, but recovers quickly, rolling out of the awkward heap she collapsed in, and forcing him backwards, out the door. 

He lands on his ass, beneath a tree barely more than a sapling. He summons it from the ground, the roots pulling clumps from the soil, and directs at her. She slows it easily, maneuvering it over his head and into the churning water below. It distracts him for a moment, bouncing down the cliffs with thuds.

He doesn’t notice that she has pushed him to the edge of the rocks until it’s too late.

“You really think it’s a smart move to kill me? You have no return ship home, and even if you did there is no way you can defeat Luke.”

“I ruined him before and can do it again. You don’t think killing you, his beloved padawan, will destroy him? Last time I killed his apprentices, he disappeared for a decade!”

But he knows she’s right. 

However, he can’t give up, can’t let Snoke see another failure.

And he still needs to uncover the location of the Jedi Temple.

He struggles against her push enough to release the pressure.

“Fine.”

“What?”

“We have a deal.”

“I didn’t propose anything.”

“Then this is your chance.” He steps closer, invading her space. “What do you need from me?”

She shivers and backs away to get him out of her personal space.

“Why are you here?” she asks suddenly. “To kill me? You won’t. I don’t think you have it in you.”

“I killed Han Solo without regret. Why should your death be any different?” Her eyes flash horrified when he mentions his deceased father.

She composes her expression. “Fine. If you stop trying to kill me, then I will help you leave.”

A small smirk twists his lips. “Okay.”

* * *

 

She's not oblivious.

She knows he won't keep this truce. 

But she needs him to stop attacking her.

So she won't kill him when she attacks back.

“Sit,” she orders him, pointing to the chair at the kitchen table. His gaze doesn’t leave hers, but he sits. She glares a second longer before leaving.

“ _ Master Luke? _ ” she calls cautiously.

“ _ I am here, young one. _ ”

“ _ What do I do? Please... please come. I can't handle him alone. _ ”

A long pause before he responds.

“ _ He will not do well in my presence. The hatred he holds for me will only end in death. I cannot influence him enough to subside his rage. It must be you, Rey. You alone can distract him. _ ”

Anger boils inside her. “ _ You knew! You knew he would crash here and you sent me-” _

“ _ Rey! _ ” he interrupts. “ _ Anger blinds you. You must control your mind. Kylo Ren is vulnerable to the pull of the Light. It will make him stumble. Make him doubt himself. _ ”

Rey doesn’t answer that.

She breaks the connection.

She watches Ren’s profile for a minute before she walks in. His hair obscures his tilted face, tumbling in his eyes.

There’s an eerie beauty in his stillness.

In his darkness.

“Where is my helmet?” he asks.

“I don’t know,” she says flippantly. Her rage still crackles under the surface.

“I want it back.”

“Why?” she says practically spitting at him. “So you can hide behind it? Get over yourself.”

He glares at her. “You are a child. You don’t understand this war or the side you’ve chosen. Luke is not the god you think he is. He is a pitiful excuse for a Force user.”

“Stop,” she grits through her teeth. She takes a shaky breath. Composes herself. “I know what you are, Kylo Ren. I know what you used to be. You were more than a fucking mask. You had humanity.”

“Did Luke show you that?” he mocks back. “Did he tell you all my weaknesses? How to turn me back to the Light?”

“You’re still human. You still have a soul.”

He rises slowly, his eyes flashing darkly. “You think...  you think...” he growls.

His shoulders tense, and she thinks he’s going to do a sort of primal scream right in her face.

He kisses her instead.

His hands clutch her shoulders, roughly pulling her forward. His mouth collides with hers. His lips aren’t as soft as they look. They pull at hers, dragging her into the kiss. His teeth click against hers.

Her lips are slow to catch up to his pace, fluttering confusedly below his. 

She can feel the rage below his skin, the power and anger. He’s not kissing her out of lust or a primal urge to rape her.

But to prove his Darkness.

And she sees it.

The tumultuousness of his soul.

The intensity terrifies her. But it fascinates her too.

(A part of her that she can’t admit wishes she could feel emotions with the intensity that he does.)

(A part of her thinks her hatred for him might come close.)

So she kisses him back. To understand him. Her breath rises in uneven bursts. The scruff of his unshaven jaw scrapes against hers. But not even this can deter her curiosity of what lies within him. Her tongue parries his. Her hands grasp the curls at the nape of his neck.

He pulls away as quickly as he started, his eyes hostile. “You can’t tell me my Darkness doesn’t burn your skin.”

She hates herself for finding him attractive in this moment. For staring too long at his swollen lips.

She doesn’t answer him.

Only turns away from his closeness. 

She desperately needs to meditate.

* * *

 

“General Hux?” calls the chief communications officer.

“My time is highly limited. Your comment must be relevant.”

“I assure you, General Hux, this is indeed important.”

Hux sighs and suppresses an eyeroll. “Proceed.”

“We have lost communications with Master Ren. His navigation device is not transmitting his location.”

“What does this mean, Hopkins?”

“At this point, it is unclear. We can assume that his navigation equipment has failed, and perhaps his fighter jet as well.”

“What do you recommend as a course of action?”

“Kylo Ren is either dead or stranded. It may be prudent to send an evacuation vessel to extract Master Ren.”

“Thank you, Hopkins.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EEK! They kissed! So exciting! But was it the kiss you wanted... Review with your thoughts! Did Kylo enjoy that kiss as much as Rey? Can he keep his side of the truce? Does Hux hate Kylo Ren enough not to come save him? Find out by subscribing!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey lovelies! Thanks for all the wonderful reviews from last chapter! It absolutely astounding to me that so many people appear to like this fic. As a courtesy warning, there is a lemon in this chapter. Review with all your thoughts and comments!
> 
> Chapter song recommendation: “Wolves Without Teeth,” Of Monsters and Men

 

“We are leaving,” she had announced shortly after their kiss. And she was already off before he could ask any specifics.

“Where are we going?”he asks her once he catches up.

They’ve been walking for awhile, up the rigid mountains.

She keeps her pace quick, and he struggles to keep up. The heat of the high sun nearly suffocates him.

She sighs in response to his question, stopping momentarily to reduce the distance between them. “Just over that ridge.” She juts her chin out to the direction.

He keeps his complaints to himself, figuring that she'll take the long way there if he starts bitching. 

Her hate for him pulses more strongly in her Force signature since he kissed her. But he’s sensed something else since then, obscured beneath the layers and layers of hate.

It feels like lust.

With a hint of fascination.

(He doesn't want to admit it.

But he thinks his own signature may have the same undertones.)

* * *

 

She does her best to remain civil around him. To not let him know how much he unnerved her. 

The echo of their kiss hovers on  her lips. 

Like a dream she can't shake. Stars, she wishes this were a dream.

She looks over her shoulder at him. Sweat clings to his forehead, beading as it threatens to run down his face. He insisted in donning those heavy black robes, and she neglected to inform him that this was the summer season. She can't believe it would have mattered though; she thinks he wears the cape to appear intimidating.

“You going to pass out?” she snaps at him.

He glares at her. “A mere hike will not kill me.”

She's sweating too. The sun beats directly overhead this time of year. The heat seems pitiful considering what she endured in Jakku, but it doesn’t take away from her current perspiration.

She leads him through a crevice in the rock that opens into a shimmering mountain spring. The water drizzles down the cliff face, slower than usual in this warmer season.

She opens her satchel, removing several canteens. She patiently fills them in the stream. She hadn't anticipated needing to fetch water on the island; she was supposed to be on her way back to the main island by now. Then she had stupidly saved this fucker from drowning.

She arranges the canteens in her satchel so they don't tip over and then carefully sets the bag in the rocks.

The sun continues to beat white hot, and hell if she passes up an opportunity to cool down. She peels off her vest and her leggings before Kylo Ren says, “What the hell are you doing?”

To be honest, a part of her had forgotten he was watching her. And now she's only in her undergarments. A twinge of self consciousness nuzzles at her when she noticed he's staring at her pale skin. She quickly banished that thought, deciding his opinions are worth shit.

“It's hot,” she replies coolly. She dips her toes in the water. They curl in the icy current, the smooth rocks beneath her feet slick and threatening to trip her. The water doesn't flow higher than her thighs at the center of the stream, but she struggles against the current to the high cliff face that the water tumbles down in a low waterfall.

She hears a splashing behind her, and she turns to see him crouched at the edge, his hands skimming the current. He scrunched his robes comically so they don't dip into the water.

She smirks at his hesitance. Thoughtlessly, she uses Force speak. “ _ Too afraid to jump in? _ ” 

But she recoils instantly when her mind touches his. It feels like tar; she'd be trapped in his murky depths of she lingered too long.

His glance toward her sends a shock of unease through her. She violated him.

But then his thoughts approach hers, restrained enough for him to transmit word, but not close enough to detect underlying feeling. “ _ Who am I to deny your challenge, sweetheart? _ ”

Her spine stiffens with the pet name. She turns her back, and ignores his smirk. Let's her fingers testing the pummeling waterfall now directly in front of her.

Tries to block out the feeling of his mind against hers.

* * *

 

She has a great ass.

He shouldn't look at her that way. He shouldn't regard her with anything but loathing.

And until now, he really hadn't noticed how she might be shaped under her garments.

He has an inkling that if she knew his thoughts, he'd be drowning in this hellishly cold water. 

He only hesitates a moment longer before stripping his cloak. Left only his undergarments, he gingerly toes the water, only submerging his ankles in the icy current. He's nearly positive that he will regret leaving his chest bare, but he knows she'll judge him with her haughty, barely clothed ass if he keep his robe on.

He eases further into the clear water. She doesn't turn as he approaches her back. She gazes up as the tumbling water, as if contemplating whether to dive in.

She says something, but he can't make it out in the crashing of the waves. “What?” he shouts.

She turns to him. “I said there isn't this much water on all of Jakku.” Her eyes squint at him, and if he's not mistaken, they linger on his pectorals. He smirks internally at the thought of her staring. A part of him wants her to find him attractive.

He doesn't realize how close together they come, perhaps only a meter apart. He backs away slightly, maneuvering around her to examine the waterfall for himself.

So that he isn't examining her instead.

* * *

 

She contemplates taking out her updo and running her hair under the cascading water, letting it untangle the knots and cool her skin from the beating sun.

But she doesn't want to let her guard down in front of him. Knows that pulling down her hair would destroy her composure.

So she splashes water over her shoulder, letting the rivulets streak down her spine, taking with it sweat that had accumulated during the morning. Kylo looks confusedly over his shoulder, and in a thoughtless instant, she splashes him too.

He narrows his eyes, and she wonders for a moment if she angered him. But he merely smirks and flicks the spray off his fingers so it hits her face.

She tries to retaliate with another splash, but he easily parries the droplets with the Force, the water hitting her instead.

She giggles without realizing, the sound dying on her throat when he raises his eyebrows.

Somehow he's close again, and his fingers reach out to tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear. She shivers when his fingers graze her skin. Her words stick in her throat, and she feels an impending kiss in his gaze.

She hates herself for desiring it. 

His eyes glint in the sunlight, and a fresh wave of loathing floods through her. She hates him. She hates the cocky swagger that accompanies his stride, so obviously fake, another mask to cover his insecurity. 

She hates that the more she looks at him, the more attractive she finds him.

That the more his gaze holds hers, the more she wants to kiss him.

And the hate bubbles up in her body so potent that she can feel it sparking from her fingers and toes. And she's not really sure why, but she's sure the only way to eradicate it from her veins is kiss him. She pushes through her feet on to her tiptoes, pulling his face to hers.

She can feel his smirk again, curling against her cheeks. She pushes every bit of hateful energy she has into her efforts to drown him in submission. She forces her tongue into his mouth, marveling at the smoothness of his teeth.

He doesn't submit though. No, he pulls her up, winding her legs around his hips. His teeth fight back against her tongue, his fingernails digging into her thighs.

The only word for it frenzied. She feels crazed, needing his hot skin against hers, needing him closer.

Needing to pour all of her hate into him.

She doesn't notice that it's not her hate that he takes from.

It's her Light.

* * *

 

He breaks his lips from hers so he doesn't stumble as he maneuvers them out of the creek. Her impatient hands run along the crevices of his abs.

When his feet steady on the stones, she wriggles down from his waist. Her hands pause, poised to pull away his undergarments. She looks up at him for consent. He raises an eyebrow back. His desire should be blatantly obvious through the soft fabric of his undergarments. “ _ Is this what you want, sweetheart? _ ” he transmits to her, unable to catch enough breath to say to words aloud.

She clenches her jaw in swift resolve, dragging his head to hers. “ _ What do you think? _ ” Her fingers swiftly untangle his final garments from his thighs. They pool unceremoniously at his feet, and he rather ungracefully kicks them off.

His fingers pull at the strips of fabric binding her breasts, releasing the tension elevating them. Her head drops back when his teeth scrape her collarbone. His fingers curl against the undersides of her breasts as she slips out of her underwear.

He swallows thickly, pulling back to take in her body. She grows impatient with his pause, urging his hips to press against hers. He pulls her up again so her legs twine around his hips. 

He can feel her force signature pulsing with frustration. If he focuses, he can see her Light. It’s pure and bright, or it would be if it weren’t shrouded in hate.

She tries to push it onto him, the anger and loathing.

He knows, however, that there’s already too much Darkness inside him. He can take hers too. He kisses her harder, delving deeper to find the Light.

She hisses when he pushes into her. Her hips spasm without rhythm until he grits his teeth and takes control of the movement, his hands gripping her her ass.

Her fingers slip between the two of them, flicking quickly at her nub until she comes. She doesn't make a sound, only grits her teeth as her body shakes above his.

He lasts only a few seconds longer, panicking when he realizes he won't have time to pull out. He tries to push her off him, but her legs grip tightly and his brain is deliriously distracted with pleasure. “Don't worry,” she murmurs in his ear. “I got the shot awhile ago.”

* * *

 

When he finishes, she untangles herself from his torso. 

Her limbs feel useless as she struggles to find her clothes. She's glad she had traded three days worth of rations for a contraceptive shot back on Jakku.

She decides not to assess any poor decisions she just made.

But her mind went blissfully blank in a way she could never achieve in meditation.

She knows she shouldn't have slept with him.

Her hate hasn't subsided.

She can't look at him. 

“Hurry up,” she says. “You're leaving this damn island.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah guys, they had sex. How do you feel about it? Tell me in the comments. Also, if you have any song recommendations that you think would work well for this fic, I’d love to hear those too! How does Rey intend to send Kylo away? Will Luke find out about the two of them having sex? Does Hux feel jealous that he was left out of the chapter? (If you haven’t noticed, I kind of love Hux.) Find out next week!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter song recommendation: “Howl,” Florence + the Machine

General Hux hears the whispers at the back of his mind. Snoke calling out to him.

“ _ Ren has failed you already, has he not, Supreme Leader? I would rather not have to fetch that incompetent scoundrel, assuming he is still alive.” _

_ “He does not fail as much as you may guess.” _

_ “With all due respect, Supreme Leader, he cannot even land his vessel without crashing it.” _

_ “He is close to discovering the location to a Jedi Temple. He will have need for your troops behind him.” _

Hux grits his teeth. “ _ I will prepare the Finalizer for a long mission.” _

* * *

 

She throws him a canteen of water before they head up the cliffside. He debates donning his dark robes, but one glance at the pulsating sun has him slinging them over his shoulder.

He follows behind her in only his undergarments and boots. 

He's shaking.

He didn't realize how surreal it would be to fuck her. Like a lucid dream.

He supposes he doesn't regret it; somehow, it makes the tension between them less palpable. He can feel the imprint of her brightness on his skin.

It makes him feel more human than he has in ages.

He wonders if this will make it harder to kill her. 

He wonders if she regrets their fucking, if she's already confessed to Luke.

They've entered into the darkness of a cave entrance before he notices how far they've walked, how tired his legs are. At this point he doesn't even bother asking where they are or why; she stopped answering him awhile ago.

His chest aches when she pulls his saber from her belt to use as a torch. He almost lets out an indignant cry, when she turns over shoulder, daring him to try to wrench it from her grip. The harsh red light flickers over her face.

“Don't,” she says. “Don't start this fight with me. I'm doing this only  _ for you _ .”

* * *

 

The cave opens into a large cavern, Luke's storehouse. She crosses to the left, pulling a large swath of tarp to reveal the  _ Millennium Falcon _ . She grimaces at how it's been kept up, the edges dusted with rust.

“Of all the ships in the galaxy...” Kylo mutters rather sarcastically.

She glares. “You don't have much of a choice. This is the only one on the planet.”

“Then how did Luke get here?”

“An X-Wing. When it became obvious I was going to train here, Artoo and Chewbacca took it back to the Resistance base. The  _ Falcon _ seats more than just one, so Luke and I could return eventually.”

Kylo looks like he wants to hit the  _ Falcon _ . His fists clench at his sides and his jaw stiffens. 

“I presume Han taught you how to fly her?”

“You think Solo showed me around the controls of this thing? You think that man was a father at all?” The heat of his anger crackles in his force signature.

“It needs a few repairs before it's ready to fly. Lucky for you, I spent the past ten years digging up spare parts.”

“How will you leave this island if I take this vessel?”

“Do you really care?”

He shrugs. “I will kill you eventually. I would be convenient to know where to find you.”

She sighs. “We get deliveries every few months. Send a message to the Resistance. They’ll come for us.”

“Not if my men have already destroyed their base.”

“Have they?” she asks, even though she can clearly feel their pulses in the Force. Leia, Poe, Finn, Chewie. They radiate like little stars.

Ren doesn’t answer.

“Didn’t think so,” she mutters.

“Does it bother you?” he asks suddenly. “The sex?”

Rey looks up from her gaze on the Falcon’s underbelly. “Should it?”

“It wasn’t very Jedi of you.”

“The Jedi Code only calls for an absence of emotional attachment.” She keeps her words clipped, knowing he’s attempting to draw out another wave of rage from her. She slides under the Falcon again. The landing on Ahch-To jostled the engine, so she’ll have to rewire the main circuitry leading from the pistons. 

She thinks he’s finally shut his infuriatingly full lips when he says, “But you felt something.”

“What? What do you possibly think I felt during animalistic, emotionless sex?”

“You’re like me. You can’t control your rage either. Don’t. You don’t have to. When harnessed, it proves far more powerful than your pitiful meditation method.”

“I am  _ nothing  _ like you.”

(She won’t admit that might not be true.)

He stares at her, until she has to drop his gaze. “The  _ Falcon _ needs enough repairs that you won’t be able to leave for another week.”

“How thrilling. Is sex a commodity I can expect during my stay?”

She squeezes her fingers into her palms to suppress her urge to scream at him. “Not on your terms,” she bites out.

* * *

What a bitch.

“Fine,” he retorts. “But this is mine.” And with all the power he can well up, he summons his saber back to him. She shoots her arm out in an attempt to catch it as it slips from her belt, but it thwacks solidly in his hand before she can apprehend it. A momentary flash of fear crosses her features. 

He missed that look. Hasn’t seen it since ordering around troops on the  _ Finalizer _ .

It makes him feel powerful.

But then the fear dissipates, leaving behind a mostly bored look. 

Like she knows he won’t use it on her.

She’s probably right.

For now, at least. He will kill her eventually. 

He backs away, deciding to rummage through Luke’s absurd storehouse rather than irritate Rey any longer.

Boxes and boxes of starchy tubers line the outer walls. Enough to last years. He pulls one of the lopsided roots out, brushing a bit of dirt off it before tossing it back into the crate. 

After ruffling through several boxes and growing rather bored before stumbling upon several crates of...

“Does Luke really still drink this shit?” he calls over to Rey.

“What shit?” her head rolls out from under the Falcon. Kylo tosses her the bottl e of Mantellian Fungolager. She catches the bottle with one hand. 

“Stars, he was drinking this devil’s piss when I was a kid.” He pops the lid, and takes a drink.

And promptly spits it back out over the floor of the cave.

The sound of Rey’s laughter echoes in the cavern, and he can’t help help himself from half-laughing, half choking either.

“You can’t be that desperate for alcohol,” she chides. “You know Luke’s the only one who can swallow more than a sip of it.”

“I bet my saber I can drink more of it than you.”

He doesn’t really know why he just said that. Why the hell he would ever bet his saber?

But she’s looking at him with a terrifying glint in her eyes, and there’s not way in hell he’s backing down now

“What’s in it for you?” she asks suspiciously.

“If I win, you tell me the location of the Jedi Temple.”

Something angry flickers in her eyes. “That’s why you’re here, isn’t it. Not just to kill me.”

He doesn’t say anything to that.

“Let me adjust this screw,” she says nodding up at the belly of the Falcon, “and then be prepared to lose.”

* * *

She’s not beyond cheating to out-drink him. She’s tiny and he’s not, and although she does have an exceptionally high tolerance from years in the desert where the water held unknown toxins and only the liquor was safe to drink, she’s not against employing the Force to lower her intoxication levels.

She knows his stare fixes on the stripe of grease on her collarbone when she sits down on a crate. She rolls the bottle he tossed her earlier between her palms. “If the stakes weren’t so high, I wouldn’t do this.”

“I know.”

She pops the cork. Takes a swig. “Fuck. This stuff has to be fermented bantha piss.”

“Drink, woman,” he taunts after gulping half the bottle.

“Stars, has anyone ever told you what a pain in the ass you are?”

“Only my father, every fucking day of my childhood. Surprised his ghost hasn’t come back spit it in my face.”

“I think he loved you.”

“He loved that walking carpet more. And how the hell would you know?” His voice is gruff and angry, and instead of looking at her, he finishes of his bottle of Mantellian Fungolager. Picks up another one.

Making her realize it’s going to be damned hard to catch up to him if he’s wallowing.

* * *

 

His words begin to slur a few sips into his third bottle. The taste doesn’t even bother him anymore. A testament to his drunken state.

But she’s keeping up.

He has the distinct feeling she’s cheating, using the Force to keep her sobered enough to keep up with him.

But then her words start slurring too. And she’s laughing too loudly, an involuntary snort escaping her nose.

And there’s only one bottle left. And she’s grabbed it, swigging it down before he can protest.

“Looks like I’ve won a lightsaber,” she says too sweetly.

And the rage boils inside of him, fueled by the burning alcohol. He pulls out his saber. She holds out her hand, but he flashes it on with a crackle. He slashes through a box of tools, metal wrenches clanging harshly.

She glares at him. “What’s wrong with you? You were the one who suggested this stupid bet in the first place. Stars, you’re a sore loser.” She stands slowly, as if she doesn’t want to set him off more than she already has. He feels her mind there, asking if she can touch his.

Tame his.

He drops the saber, the red light flickering off before it hits the ground.

She stands there like a goddess.

Like his fucking redemption.

Why does he have to be attracted to the way she bites her lip. To the curve of her shoulder, and even her harsh tongue that doesn’t put up with his shit.

And then he kisses her.

His knows his lips are too brutal against hers. That her neck crooks at an awkward angle.

But her hips angle perfectly into his. Her hands brand hot sears beneath his soft undershirt. Her mind too sears against his, white hot, bright, alive.

Light.

He’s drowning in her.

Fuck, he must be piss drunk.

He reaches for it, her Light.

And she pulls away. “No,” she says, and she trembles so violently that he reaches out a hand to steady her. She swats it away. “No,” she repeats. “What are you doing to me? You’re... You’re trying to take...”

“Your Light is highly addictive,” he stupidly admits. 

“But the more you take... the less human I feel. I’m losing myself! And it’s you! Luke told me the Light would distract you, but not like this. I can’t do this. I can’t lose myself in you. You’re a monster.”

And she throws up the entire contents of her stomach.

* * *

Luke Skywalker can feel the antagonism between them. It ripples out of their Force signatures like sparks.

And there’s another signature coming nearer. Something with intentions of destruction.

More destruction than he stop on on his own.

He composes a note to send to Leia with the next delivery.

* * *

 

General Organa signs off on a purchase for another thousand missiles when BB-8 rolls in with the message. Poe Dameron saunters in behind the droid.

“Who’s the message from, General? Little rascal won’t tell me.”

“Luke,” she breathes. “It’s from Luke.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks guys so much for reading! Let me know what you think of the chapter, of the song suggestion. What do you want to see in the next chapter? Will the Resistance arrive on Ahch-To too late to fight against Hux? Will Rey and Kylo ever get over their angst enough to have sex again? Will the fandom kill me if they don’t?


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter song recommendation: “Lost!” Coldplay

**** She keeps her distance from him.

Three days.

Keeps her conversation clipped. No more than five words at a time.

And the less she talks, the more agitated he grows. His sporadic outbursts send towers of boxes plummeting while she works.

She mostly tries to ignore him. 

Thankfully, he doesn’t try to touch her, doesn’t try to kiss her. 

“When will this be done?” he snaps at her, stalking over to where she’s fixing the hydraulic pressure gauge.

“I want you gone just as much as you want to be gone.”

“I’m bored,” he mutters.

“Meditate,” she says, mostly just to piss him off.

He glares at her. “Fuck you.”

His dark eyes glitter dangerously. She wants to reach out for him, for his Force signature. Wants to get lost in it.

“Get out,” she says. She won’t deal with his allure.

She’s the one who’s supposed to allure him.

He stalks off.

Fuck him.

* * *

 

He storms out of the cavern, into the drizzling rain.

He hates rain.

But he hates her more.

He had tried to crack her mind the day before. Had slunk up behind her and launched a brutal attack against her defenses.

He hadn’t even gotten close; in the space of a heartbeat, she pushed him away.

But not without lingering too long. Not without peering carefully into his soul.

He couldn’t lift the location of the Jedi Temple. He can’t imagine what will happen to him if he ultimately can’t complete this mission. If he fails Snoke.

If a little girl comes between him and success.

His rage trembles in his blood, volatile and burning. He has to clench his jaw to suppress a scream.

He’s losing.

But he will not fail.

* * *

 

She groans when she realizes what has to happen next.

The Falcon can’t launch past the atmosphere from this island; it’s too small and there isn’t enough space to ascend. They’re going to have to pay a visit to the mainland.

They’re going to have to see Luke.

She was supposed to have fixed his darkness by now.

She hasn’t even succeeded in distracting him.

* * *

 

He forages some wildberries out in the brush. He’s not entirely confident they aren’t poisonous, but he’s desperate for something exciting, and a dare with death might just do the trick.

It’s not like he can’t heal himself if he starts asphyxiating. 

He pops the blood red spheres into his mouth. The sweetness dances over his tongue before disappearing down his throat.

He waits a moment.

Damn.

No poison.

* * *

 

She walks outside to confront him.

“The  _ Falcon _ should be in working order.”

“Finally.”

“But we shouldn’t take off in this rain.” The droplets splat on her skin much heavier than they would have an hour ago. “I think it might thunder.”

“What do we do until then?”

‘We aren’t having sex, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“Now I am.”

She refuses to acknowledge the flash of arousal that sparks between her legs. 

“I’m sorry.”

“For denying sex?”

She shoots him a death glare. “No, for just... being a bitch I guess.”

He doesn’t say anything. Why the hell this man has to be so brooding is beyond her.

“I’m sorry,” she repeats.

“I heard you.”

“I think there’s a few bottles of  Mantellian Fungolager left.”

“You kidding? Luke has crates and crates of that shit. But I’m not getting drunk with you again.”

“I wasn’t suggesting getting drunk.”

“No, but you’re trying to diffuse the tension. Face it, sex was the only thing that’s come close.”

She shivers as the water permeates her clothes.

She’s about to storm off, to walk back into the cavern so she doesn’t have to look at his face. At the disfiguring scar she gave him that awful day that Han died. 

But he rises and turns, stalking back to the cave.

Shit.

She really doesn’t want to stay out here in the rain. Thunder crackles ominously in the distance.

So she follows him, like it’s no big thing. She knows he can sense her; she watches as his shoulders tighten, but he doesn’t turn, doesn’t question her.

Maybe, she thinks dryly, he’s warming up to her.

* * *

 

He doesn’t really want to talk to her.

She’s fascinating. Too fascinating. 

The pull of the Light grips talons into his thoughts.

_ Help me, Lord Vader. Help me resist the temptation. _

He gets nothing in response.

Fuck.

* * *

 

She rummages around in the storage shelves for some dried meat. Carefully approaches him lying on the floor staring upward blankly.

She drops the meat on his chest. He flinches comically when the package bounces off his stomach. She sits down beside him, ripping open the packaging with her teeth and tossing it over her shoulder. Tears into the meat rather savagely.

“I’m not hungry,” he says. She shrugs and takes it from him, about to rip open the second package, when he stops her, easing the dried meat from her grip. “Maybe I am if it means not having to watch your barbarism again.”

She rolls her eyes. “You’ve got a massive stick up your ass, Ren.”

He narrows his eyes. “And I presume you want to help me fish it out.” He snickers when her face goes red.

“I meant-”

“I know what you fucking meant. It’s not happening. I’m not going to divulge all of my issues so you can put me back together like a fucking machine.”

“I didn’t ask you to.”

She lays her back on the ground so she doesn’t have to look at his face. The quiet lingers between them for a moment.

“I don’t care about bringing you back to the Light,” she admits.

“Really?” he asks suspiciously.

“Luke’s the one who thinks you have potential. He’s the one that really cares.”

“Then why are you doing this? Why are you here wasting your time?”

_ Because I hate you. _

_ Because you fascinate me. _

_ Because I can't bear to disappoint Luke. _

“Because I was ordered to.”

* * *

She fidgets next to him. Her fingers tap. Her knees bounce. He has to smirk at how much Luke must hate getting her to meditate.

She turns her head toward him. “Can I ask you something?”

He gets a distinct feeling he's not going to like her question. “What?”

“What don't you miss about the  _ Finalizer _ ?”

“General Hux,” he says without hesitation. “Stars, that's the man you should criticize for having a stick up his ass.”

She laughs a little, and then murmurs, “See, it's not so hard to answer questions.”

“Fucking hell, Rey,” he says. 

“Sorry.” She sits back up, her fidgeting not allowing her to stay in one space too long.

“Am I making you anxious?” he asks. He runs his thumb down the side of her wrist. She startles, but doesn’t move her hand. Her lips press together at the contact, stiffening, closing herself off to his mind. She looks at him for a long moment.

“What are you, Kylo Ren?”

“You said it yourself. I’m a monster.”

She drops her head. “Yes, I suppose you are.”

His still fingertips hover on the inside of her wrists, and he lets them graze up her arm.

“What are you doing?” she asks. 

Her supple skin ripples with muscle under his fingers and he wonders how anything can be so flawless. “Do you want me to stop?” 

Her head shakes the tiniest no, almost imperceptible. Her fidgeting stills. His fingers caress the curve of her shoulder. She brushes the wayward strands of hair from his forehead, her fingers lingering on his temple. She leans forward, loose tendrils of hair brushing his jaw. She hesitates before tilting her lips to meet his. He lets her hover there for a moment, reveling in the first moment between them not laced with violent hate.

He drops his head, his lips grazing her collarbone. He pulls his body up and over hers, easing her back against the ground. Her fingers drag slowly along his scalp, and he gives a rough groan into her breasts.

He can feel the quiet in her. Her refusal to let her thoughts pervade this moment.

They strip pieces of their clothing, layer after layer piling on the ground beside them. He can't resist tasting her skin, the curve beneath her breast, the valley of her navel, the crease of her hip. He lowers himself farther back, resting his weight on his heels, tilting her lower body upward to reach his mouth. She spasms when his teeth drag slowly toward her clit. He's sure she can feel his smirk as he toys with the soft nub before darting out his tongue.

He barely concentrates on what he's doing, so distracted by her reaction to him. Her trembling increases when he adjusts his grip to the back of her legs, his thumbs pointing inward and softly grazing her sensitive skin.

She's close, he's sure. Her ass thrusts over and over, ensuring he doesn't stop.

An evil, wicked idea nudges at his movements.

And so he pulls back, leaving her there on the precipice of falling. 

(But really, she is Light.

She is radiance.

And he pulls back because cannot beat to taint that.)

“Fuck, what-” she protests, but he interrupts her.

“The rain stopped. We should leave.”

Anger replaces the confusion in her face, and he knows that it is only her hate for him that keeps her from begging him to finish her.

* * *

 

“Yeah, I guess we should.”  She clenches her legs together, and slowly, her arousal subsides.

She feels like a fool.

For letting it get that far in the first place.

(But she's also relieved he didn't let her fall into his Darkness again.)

His posture as they enter the Falcon she could mildly describe as hesitant.

“His ghost isn’t going to pop out at you.”

He looks at her sideways, but doesn’t respond.

She collapses into the pilot’s seat, and he regards the copilot’s with a look of contempt. “Stars Kylo, just sit! You’re wasting time.” He does as told, and she shows him the basic controls.

“I know how to fly!” he snaps.

She looks at him blandly. “Okay, get us out of here.”

The cavern has an entrance for aircrafts toward the top at a very steep angle. He just sinks back into the co-pilot's seat. “That’s what I thought,” she mutters.

She maneuvers the craft up and out in a few minutes, only dislodging a few clumps of dirt.

The flight is unbearably quiet, the tension of their unfinished sexual encounter lingering stagnantly. She’s a bit relieved when they descend, even though he grows more agitated the closer they get there. He disgustedly picks a strand of hair off the seat, and Rey has to suppress a smile when she realizes it’s Chewbacca’s.

She crashes a little bit more than she lands, and when she opens the hatch, Luke stands there in all his peaceful glory.

She’s never been more grateful to see anyone.

* * *

 

He’s never felt more loathing than he does stepping off the  _ Millenium Falcon _ and staring into the face of Luke Skywalker.

He could kill the both of them, right here. But he’d lose the location of the Jedi Temple.

“Hello Master Luke,” Rey says politely, and he can tell she’s relaxed her shoulders, let her guard down a bit.

“Rey,” Luke nods. “And Ben Solo. I hoped you would return.”

His spine stiffens at his given name, but he knows snarling out  _ Kylo Ren _ won’t help this situation. “I have not returned. Your little padawan has outfitted this vessel to allow me to return to the First Order.”

“Pity,” Luke says, but he does not look particularly disappointed.

Ren has a feeling this won’t turn out well for him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will Kylo Ren just leave Rey and return to the First Order? Will Rey ever get her payback for Kylo leaving her hanging during sex? Review and subscribe to find out!
> 
> Next chapter, look out for some super fluffy StormPilot shipping!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t believe it! With this chapter, this fic will officially become the longest work I have ever written. Thank you all for your tremendous support! Your reviews are always so inspiring!
> 
> This chapter starts off with a brutal cliffhanger (sorry guys), and while Rey won’t get her revenge this chapter, lookout next week for The Humiliation of Kylo Ren. This chapter is a lot of Stormpilot comic relief, so enjoy! 
> 
> Chapter song recommendation: “Something I Need,” One Republic

**** She can’t look at Kylo Ren. 

Not with Luke watching her. And deducing what may or may not have happened between them.

But really, it’s Luke’s fucking fault; he’s the one who told her to “distract” Ren.

“Will you have a cup of tea, Ben?” Luke inquires with a smile gracing the corners of his lips.

“No.”

Rey has to press her lips together to suppress a giggle. The tension between the three of them is almost painful.

Kylo holds out his hand to her expectantly, and she worries for a moment that he means for her to take it. But instead he demands, “My saber.”

She doesn’t know what to do, as she technically did win it from him. She glances at Luke, who only looks mildly disinterested. Never has advice when she needs it most. Typical.

“Only if you come in for tea,” she finally responds.

He doesn’t give any reaction, but she hears his footsteps when she turns to back to her cottage.

* * *

 

Luke pours the two of them tea at the kitchen table in Rey’s cottage. He had insisted she sit while he served, and when she protested, he shot her a look he knew always shut her up.

He watches the two of them carefully. She mumbles an apology when her elbow accidentally hits his, and he grunts a non-response.

There’s no doubt in Luke’s mind that these two have fucked.

Darned kids.

But a part of him sees a small possibility that could turn out well.

* * *

 

Kylo drinks his tea so quickly he scalds his tongue and probably won’t be able to taste anything for a week.

But before he can kick his chair back, demand his saber, possibly the location of the Jedi Temple, and get the fuck out, Luke pours him another cup. 

The shitty grass water leaves a bitter taste in mouth. He wants to ask for sweetener, but figures it won’t pair well with his dark demeanor.

“Scone, Ben,” Luke offers, and Kylo has to clench his teeth to keep from screaming.

“Actually, it’s time for me to leave. Saber?” he demands. She slowly reaches into her tunic and hands it to him, blade-end first. “And you won’t tell me the location of the Jedi Temple, I presume, so farewell.”

He walks out then, and within seconds he hears her her distinctive gait following him.

Good. Very good. 

They left the boarding ramp descended, the engine’s still running, so all he has to do to lift off is flick a few switches. He can’t wait to be off this forsaken planet.

Turns over his shoulder at the familiar hiss of a light saber opening. She’s staring at him with the strangest expression on her face. 

Like disappointment.

That she doesn’t get to kiss him. 

And then kill him.

(Although, that may just be a projection of his own thoughts.)

“Coming with me?” he teases. She takes a step forward, her boots clanging on the harsh metal of the boarding ramp. The noise makes her startle, and she stops.

A few seconds of eye contact. His lips quirk. This is shaping up better than he had even imagined.

Unexpectedly, he grabs her, throwing her over his shoulder. She screams, kicking furiously, but he holds tight around her waist. With a wave of his palm, the ramp raises, and she’s still squirming as he moves back so she can’t make an escape.

He catches Luke’s eye before the ramp fully ascends.

And Luke softly nods.

* * *

 

“Ready for lift off?” Poe asks, his infectious energy lifting Finn’s spirits enough to momentarily forget that he frequently gets nauseated during in those rocky moments after the craft barrels through the atmosphere.

Poe’s smile at him might do the trick too.

“Uh... yeah, yeah,” Finn replies, probably too late to seem normal.

After receiving Luke’s plea for help, Leia sent a fleet of Resistance members to scout the danger.

She just so “happened” to put the two of them together. He can’t decide if General Organa is just completely oblivious or understands that he’s hard core pining.

Poe looks over at him, a smile quirked at the corner of his lips. “Let’s go rescue our girl.”

No one mentions that she probably doesn’t need  _ rescuing  _ as she can actually use the Force.

(Little do either know that she’s just been kidnapped by a man intent on killing her.)

Poe Dameron spent too many years using as little water he could in the ‘fresher. They don’t have unlimited supplies in hyperspace.

Finn is taking for-fucking-ever.

He debates barging in.

Thinks better of it.

He doesn’t want to come on too strong.

* * *

 

Finn shakes his hair out, apologizing profusely when Poe has to wipe a stray droplet off his cheek.

“It’s all good,” Poe says, and he’s smiling at Finn in that way that makes him go weak at the knees.

Poe leans over. Brushes a spot near Finn’s temple. “Missed a drop,” and the mischievousness in his voice is unmistakable.

“Uh, yeah,” Finn stammers, his fingers swiping at the spot where Poe’s had left a moment before. “I, uh, was going to grab something to eat... Do you want anything?”

Poe glances out to the vastness of space, and Finn regrets distracting the pilot. “Yeah, sure. Whatever you’re having.”

Yeah, Finn’s fucked.

* * *

 

Finn does that rumply-thing with his hair, and Poe’s also pretty sure he’s fucked.

* * *

 

Laying in his bunk that night, Finn knows he won’t sleep. The noise of the hyperdrive is too loud, too inconsistent for actual relaxation.

Poe saunters in, and Finn debates being asleep so he can oggle the shirtless glory through his eyelashes.

Decides that’s creepy and probably not worth it. 

He sits up in bed. “Are we going to crash while you’re asleep?”

Poe cracks a grin. “I certainly hope not. The autopilot was working when we left. I am the best pilot on the galaxy.”

And perhaps the most attractive...

Finn gives a half-hearted chuckle, distracted as Poe turns to the closet, his arms stretching over his head, causing the muscles in his back to ripple. Finn collapses back into his pillows.

“Are you excited to see her?” Poe asks.   


“What?”

“Rey. You two...”

“Yeah. She um... Wait, what?” 

Poe shrugs. “I don’t know. It just seemed like before she left, there could have been something between the two of you.”

Shit. Shit shit shit. If he thinks he’s into... Shit.

“No,” Finn says in a strangled voice, probably too quickly and emphatically. “She’s um... We’re just...”

Poe waits for him to continue.

“I love her, but not like that. She’s... she’s just...”

“No, I get it. I don’t envy your time with the First Order. She brought you out of that awful place.” And when Poe says it, it’s like the simplest thing.

“Well, actually you did.”

“Abandoned you pretty quickly after that, didn’t I?” Poe muses.

“You’re here now.”

Poe flashes him a smile before collapsing into his sheets. “Yeah. Yeah, I am.”

Finn smiles to himself.

Maybe this could work out.

* * *

 

Poe wakes up three hours earlier than he would have liked with a desperate need to pee. He stays there for a moment, debating if his bladder has the capacity to hold out for another few hours so that he doesn’t have to leave his warm sheets. He grits his teeth. Nope.

He untangles his legs from the sheets, stumbling out of the dark room with a mild attempt at keeping quiet no to wake Finn.

He blearily turns on the light, the harsh blue color jolting him unexpectedly. He pees, his eyes half open to limit their light exposure. He pulls up his pants.

Finn’s standing in the hallway looking confused.

“Everything alright Finn?”

Finn doesn’t reply.

“Finn?”

“Yeah,” Finn covers. “I couldn’t sleep, and I heard something out here... I didn’t know you were out here. Flying just makes me antsy.”

“We’ll be there soon. Probably tomorrow, assuming we can stay in hyperspace.”

Finn nods, but the dazed look in his eyes doesn’t leave. Poe steps forward, grasping Finn’s elbow. Finn flinches, but his eyes lock with Poe’s.

“Are you alright, Finn?”

Finn steps closer to him. Poe’s arm drifts higher, caressing his shoulder. Finn swallows, glancing down at Poe’s hand. Poe draws back, afraid he went too far. But Finn stops him, his fingers curling around Poe’s wrist.

“Is this okay?” Finn asks, and Poe can only nod, can only run his fingers over the taught muscles in Finn’s neck. He pulls Finn’s head forward, his nails scraping his scalp. 

And then they’re kissing, and Poe’s not really sure how to describe it, only that it’s hot and beautiful, and that he really doesn’t want to stop. 

Until he has to because he’s fallen in so far that he can’t breathe, and he stares up at Finn, a small smile quirked on his mouth.

“Goodnight Finn.” And then Poe goes back to bed, tripping over yesterday’s discarded clothes.

“Goodnight Poe,” comes Finn’s voice after a few moments, after he’s slipped beneath his own sheets. “And yeah, I am alright.”

* * *

 

Finn pulls himself out of bed after too many hours of too little sleep. His stomach growls and his head throbs. 

Poe already sits at the helm, running his fingers through his hair to brush the curls from his eyes. Finn flushes, remembering last night. He decided to play it cool and not mention the kiss. 

“Oh good!” Poe says spinning around to face Finn. “You're awake. Buckle up.” He motions towards the chair for the copilot next to him. “We're exiting hyperdrive.”

Finn does as he's told, clipping himself into the seat. Poe shoots him a grin as he reaches for the handle to pull them from hyperspace. “Don't worry. You'll be fine,” Poe reassures, and Finn can only nod. Poe pulls the lever, and Finn has to bite his lip to keep from shouting in surprise when the ship jolts violently. 

And then they're racing toward Ahch-To, the blue planet growing larger and larger.

“It’s beautiful,” Finn breathes, and Poe lets out a low whistle. They stare out for a while until suddenly...

“What the hell?” Poe says, and a blue streak jets through the dark. 

Finn squints harder and realizes... “That’s, that’s the  _ Millennium Falcon _ !” 

Poe does a bit of a double take, but he nods in affirmation. “Why is she up here?” he murmurs.

“Can we intercept them?”

But Poe’s already shaking his head, “We’re moving too quickly and in the wrong direction. We have to land on the planet.”

“Okay.”

“Hold on tight,” Poe says with a wry, quirky smile.

And he pulls the clutch, lurching them into a descent.

* * *

 

The blue planet of Ahch-To comes into General Hux’s view.   


“Prepare all Troopers for battle ranks,” he tells Captain Phasma.

“Of course, General,” she says, and leave.

Good riddance. That woman has the demeanor that makes even him shudder.

He hates that he has to rescue Kylo Ren. He always knew that incompetent son of a bitch would be the First Order’s downfall.

He will be successful.

And if Kylo Ren doesn’t make it in the gunfire, it won’t be Hux’s fault.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me all your thoughts! Your reviews are so inspiring and expedite the writing process. What does Hux have planned once he lands on Ahch-To? Will Finn and Poe get into a relationship? How will Rey react to being kidnapped by Kylo, and will she finally get back at him for skimping on sex? Find out next week!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovely readers! I am so sorry this chapter is so late. I started a new job in the last month and it’s turned out to be quite the time-suck. In case you’ve forgotten, we last left our main characters launching into space after Kylo had kidnapped Rey off of Ahch-To...  
> Chapter Song Recommendation: “Immortals,” Fall Out Boy.

**Hello lovely readers! I am so sorry this chapter is so late. I started a new job in the last month and it’s turned out to be quite the time-suck. In case you’ve forgotten, we last left our main characters launching into space after Kylo had kidnapped Rey off of Ahch-To...**

 

**Chapter Song Recommendation: “** **_Immortals_ ** **,” Fall Out Boy.**

As the hatch of the Millennium Falcon shuts, the light in the entryway dims.

She barely notices. 

His arm tightens around her waist, and she can’t even squirm under the pressure of the Force he uses to keep her down.

Her screams tire even her own ears after a few minutes. And as the  _ Millennium Falcon  _ ascends into the cerulean sky, Kylo dumps her body into a heap onto the floor.

“What the fuck, you bastard!”

“I can't fly this trash heap myself,” he says, and his lie vibrates in his Force signature. 

“Then get your fucking hands away from the controls!”

She ignores the bruises she just aquired in her tumble out of his arms as she jolts forward. She hip checks him away from the main switchboard, her fingers flying over the buttons and keys.

And then her arms still, unable to move through the hold he's summoned over them. “You will not land us,” he orders, his voice tinged with the Force. 

“I can't.”

A cloud of confusion passed over his face. “What?”

“I can't land us. You don't have to Force me.” When the confusion doesn't pass, she huffs in exasperation and continues, “Our acceleration is getting us too near escape velocity. I can't pilot us back and land on one of those tiny islands without killing us both.”

“Okay,” he says, but she can tell he's uneasy. 

“You supposedly need me to pilot this thing. You have to trust me.”

But she knows he doesn’t need her for this. And she can't figure out why he’s taken her. Why he didn’t just leave her to rot on Ahch-To.

She swallows her fury bubbling up again. She must focus, must find a way out of this ship.

She nudges a few more controls, keeping her face passive. She has to make him think... can't have him catch in that...

And with a final flick, she leaves the  _ Falcon  _ in autopilot. Let’s get anger surge back, igniting her veins with a sick lust. She spins the pilot's seat toward him, and the sight of his slightly parted lips makes her own quirk upwards.

And she resolves to make him pay for his actions earlier. For halting before her orgasm, for running out on Luke, for kidnapping her. She launches forward, twining her fingers in his hair and her lips against his. She pours everything she had into him, all her passion and- stars help her- all her emotional turmoil.

His lips still beneath her’s, but they don't resist her tongue slipping through his teeth. Her fingers snake around his hips and and he gasps when her nails scratch into his skin, when her teeth dig into his lower lip. 

“Rey,” he breathes when she moves to flick her tongue along his collarbone. “Rey...”

She tugs the nape of his neck, her lips colliding with his again and again, desperately trying to coerce a reaction, and finally, he kisses her back.

Passionately. 

Emphatically.

She pushes him backwards, leading him out of the cockpit and through the winding hallways, crashing through the doorway of one of the bunk rooms. He stumbles over his feet as her hands collide into his chest, his ass dropping to the bed. 

“Rey,” he gasps. 

“What?” she says, finally pulling back. Her chest heaves, and a part of her is incredulous they the two of them are still fully clothed. 

“I- I, um,”

She looks at him expectantly. Unwinds her tunic from her breasts. His eyes drift over her body, and she sees the moment when he relents to her, when his gaze hardens and his fingers press more firmly into her biceps.

“Damnit, let’s fuck.”

* * *

 

There’s something she’s not telling him.

This should not be happening.

She should be angrier, she should be attempting to kill him.

She should not be trying to sleep with him.

He can’t sense anything in her Force signature except overwhelming lust. And, oh fuck, does that send ripples through his spine. He pulls her hips closer, and her forehead dips to press against his.

He’s pulling away her undergarments, and her fingers twirl in the hair at his navel. His lips find hers, catching them before she can move lower. He knows how this will go if he lets her use her mouth on him; he can’t make payback for earlier this afternoon that easy.

She kisses him back almost sweetly before pulling away, her head dropping again. “Stars no, Rey,” he chides. “Try a little harder, Sweetheart.” He takes and endearing nip at her ear.

She scowls at him, but it resolves into a grin. A positively shit eating grin... Stars, he’s fucked.

His clothes fall away, and her skin is so hot against his. It sears his chest when she presses her breasts against him. “Kylo,” she groans, and he nearly forgets how to breathe.

And then she’s easing onto his erection, and when he somehow manages a talented swivel of his hips, she moans into the bend of his shoulder.

His thrusts start in jerky movements, and he tries to hold onto her hips to still her erratic bounces. She squints her eyes at him in irritation, but doesn’t protest more.

One of her hands slides between them, presumably to pull her closer to orgasm. He tries to bat her fingers away, to replace them with his own, but she glares at him, pulling his palm to her breast instead. It occurs to him that he’s never made her come. Even that first time, it was her fingers that brought her over the edge. He flicks her nipple taught instead, and her breaths erupt in shallow gasps. His teeth move to the top of her breast and he spends longer than he should there, her skin a vibrant pink when he pulls away.

And then she’s falling, shattering in orgasm. He falls back into the mattress to watch as her face ripples in pleasure. 

He finds her perfect in this moment. Simultaneously in control and not. 

After a few moments she’s kissing him, and her hips rise, pulling off his cock, and he can’t quite understand what’s happening, only that he needs her back on him. He’s so close...

Her lips nip the shell of his ear, and her voice is deep and sexy. “ _ She’s coming _ .” 

He doesn’t understand what that means, why she’s referring to herself in the third person, how she can possibly be orgasming again. Maybe it’s just his brain, clouded with lust as her lips tease his skin. 

Her voice comes again, this time laced with a smirk. “Your mother. She’ll be here tomorrow.”

* * *

 

She lifts her leg over his, stepping gingerly on the floor.

The high of her orgasm and his defeat skitters warmly through her veins, and she stretches, releasing the built up tension from muscles.

And maybe to drive him insane.

He’s biting his tongue, his eyes bulging, obviously a sorry attempt to calm his erection. Serves him right. But she’s impressed he has enough self control not to continue with his own hand. 

“What do you mean?” he asks, his voice pinched in restraint. “How is my mother coming here? We’re in the middle of hyperspace.”

“You might want to look out the window, my friend.”

She gestures out the door where in the small window in the room across the hall, the green blue planet of Ahch-To glitters. “How the hell...” Kylo trails off. “We should be light years from that Force-forsaken planet!”

“I put us in orbit,” she says softly. “I don’t believe it’s my destiny to leave yet.” She stares trancelike out the window. “I can’t. Not when Finn and Poe have just arrived. Not when your armies are about to attack. Something remains for me here.”

“Only death remains if you go back there. The star destroyer will decimate this planet.” He’s leaning over the bed, searching on the floor for his undergarments. He pulls the white garment over his half-stiff cock. “It’s the Jedi Temple, isn’t it? It must be on Ahch-To. That’s why you want to go back?”

She shrugs. “It’s not my time to leave.” 

“We can’t go back. There is nothing we can do to stop what is to come.”

“ _ We _ ? There is no we! You and I are nothing. There is no common goal that we share. You enslaved yourself to homicidal tyrant and you want to take me back to him and brainwash me with delusions of power!”

His jaw hardens. His eyes shift away “What?” she demands. 

“I... I don’t think I want to go back there.” It’s mumbled and too soft and she doesn’t understand what it could mean.

She stares at him. “You don’t want to go back where?”

He stands up and brushes past her. “The First Order.”

“What? How-”

“I’m not going back.”

She stares at him for a long moment. Her voice is low and dangerous when she finally speaks. “Then where were you planning to take me?”

He doesn’t answer.

“Fucking hell, Ren!” she shouts down the hallway at him.

He spins around, and then her head is flooded with images, his thoughts pressing against her mind, demanding to be examined.

And in his thoughts she sees the two of them and it’s unbelievably, impossibly  _ happy _ . 

_ “What am I looking at?”  _ she asks his thoughts.

_ “What could be.” _

And all the sudden, it makes sense why he took her. Why he made up that lie about needing her to pilot.

_ “I don’t want this... _ ” she tries to protest. “ _ Nevermind that it’s an impossibility. _ ”

“ _ It’s not. All we need is to leave. Leave the First Order, the Resistance. The past...” _

_ “You can’t just leave! You can’t just abandon what you’ve started! This... This is an illusion a fantasy. It can’t happen! You’re running away from the evil you’ve done.” _

_ “No. I don’t want redemption. I want peace. I want to be rid of this battle; I cannot choose the Darkness or the Light. I don’t want to choose. I just... can’t choose.” _

_ “Kylo-” _

_ “We could be gods of our own planet.” _

_ “We would be alone.” _

_ “Is that such a bad thing?”  _ And around them manifests small children with her hazel eyes and his dark hair.

But she thinks back to Finn and Poe, Chewie, Leia, Luke.  _ “But I can’t! I have responsibilities! I have friends and...”  _ She trails off as he pulls out of her mind. “No. At least not yet. I have to defeat Snoke and the First Order. I have to make my mark-”

“Don’t you understand? If you don’t come now, you never will. There will always be injustice. After you defeat the First Order, someone else will rise! And you will run off in your haughty Jedi delusion to stop them too.”

“I can’t, Kylo! I can’t just abandon them. I’m sorry.”

“I can’t choose a side.”

“Then what are you going to do?”

He doesn’t answer. She doesn’t press him.

* * *

 

He’ll follow her.

Anywhere.

With her, he doesn’t feel like he’s falling apart.

He lets her take the controls.

He lets her pull them out of orbit.

He lets her descend their ship.

“Wait,” he says.

“What?”

“Take us to the Jedi Temple. There might be something there. Something that could help us destroy Snoke.”

“What kind of something.”

But he doesn’t answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Review with all your thoughts and comments! Will Rey and Kylo find the Jedi Temple? Will Hux beat them to the surface of the planet? Can Rey and Kylo ever find it within themselves to have normal sex? Find out be subscribing! (Hopefully the next chapter will be up in the next couple of weeks.)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter song recommendation: "Unsteady," X Ambassadors

The  _ Millennium Falcon _ plummets back to the surface of Ahch-To.

The downward pitch makes Kylo’s stomach turn.  

Or maybe that’s because she won’t look at him.

* * *

 

She can’t look at him.

She knows she disappointed him when she didn’t agree to run away with him.

She knows she chose correctly.

But she doesn’t like the clenching in her gut.

Or maybe it’s the quick descent of the  _ Falcon _ .

* * *

 

Finn holds on tight as he and Poe land on Ahch-To.

“What do we do now?” he asks when Poe shuts off the ignition. “There’s no one here.”

“We find Luke Skywalker. And we report back to General Organa where to send her troops.” And Poe’s voice is so sure, so laced with conviction, that Finn can’t do anything more than agree that this is what they must accomplish.

“Okay.”

They open the doors and breathe in the fresh sea breeze.

* * *

 

Leia lets the pilot direct them through hyperspace. Finn and Poe have yet to report, but their transmission containing the coordinates of where to land on Ahch-To isn’t expected for another six hours.

Her mind flits back to how it should be Han in that cockpit, cracking a dry comment to make her stifle a laugh.

But  _ he _ took that from his father. From her too.

She doesn’t know what’s worse: to believe Ben killed his father or to believe Ben is gone.

She curses under her breath.

* * *

 

General Hux panics.

The planet’s islands are too small and too dispersed to land a fleet of aircrafts, and he doesn’t have enough fuel to launch an aerial attack. Not to mention that fact that his new recruit storm troopers have no training to fire the ship cannons with any accuracy. It has to be a ground attack.

The destroyer is nearly as big as the planet; he can’t fight an intricate battle from here.

He curses under his breath.

* * *

 

Luke slowly opens one eye after his mid-day meditation session.

They’re coming.

Luke knows his flare for the dramatic is getting the better of him. Obi-Wan in his pure, reserved stoicism would be rather displeased.

But he’s had only the company of the woodland creature for several years now. A part of him itches for something a little more interesting.

He does not know what is to come, and while it may not be  _ good _ , it will be interesting...

* * *

 

“Don’t go back to Luke,” Kylo says.

She presses her lips together, but doesn’t verbally protest. She knows he longs for more than the sage advice of Master Skywalker’s power.

She knows the Jedi Temple is out there.

“How do you know where it is?” she says through clenched teeth.

“You can’t feel it?” he asks. “I confess, I confused it with Luke’s Force signature when I first landed, but it gives off a much more powerful, much more ancient signature.”

She doesn’t answer. 

“Here,” he offers, and extends his hand to adjust the landing settings. She looks at his hand but doesn’t relinquish the controls.

“Let me land first.”

He pulls his hand back with no small amount of hurt.

* * *

“General Hux. What are your orders?” Captain Phasma asks him persistently. He’s not sure how much longer he can take the pressure of her masked gaze. Especially when it seems there is no optimal way to launch this attack.

“How many inflatable water vessels do we have?”

“Eighty-five. Each seats six troopers.”

Barely over five-hundred troopers. If he had it his way, he’d deploy all thirty-five hundred he has aboard the destroyer.

“Put them in the evac planes and give them parachutes. Each plane should have two extra troopers to stay in the vessel after the troopers deploy.”

“Excellent, General.” And finally she walks away.

Hux sinks back into his chair.

He can’t fuck this up.

* * *

 

Kylo hasn’t seen this side of the planet before.

The blue waters extend farther than they do on the other side, the islands disappearing into the sea.

And then he sees it, the crest of land.

He points, a moot gesture since she’s already descending, directing them toward the sliver of green and tan dotting the horizon. He sits down, strapping himself into the chair.

She doesn’t even turn her head toward him.

So he presses his lips together and takes to inspecting his fingernails.

* * *

 

Poe keeps his blaster crooked in his palm.

He might be the more confident between Finn and himself, but that does not mean his is brave.

The rocks crunch beneath Finn’s boots, and Poe shoots him a shut-up look over his shoulder. Finn’s cheeks color in embarrassment. The most adorable event so far today.

It is then that Poe, thoroughly distracted with Finn, stumbles down the ridge. His feet slip from under him, the rock beneath his toes shattering. He yelps as his plummet continues.

And then he crashes into the crags below.

* * *

 

Rey flips the toggles as their descent quickens.

She can feel it now. The ancient power Kylo mentioned earlier. She can’t believe she hadn’t felt it before now. 

But she wasn’t attuned to the Force back when she first arrived with Chewbacca, and by the time she’d learned, the soft vibration merely droned in background noise.

But here, now, it roars, calls

And she wants it, wants to reach out and feel it surging through her.

Kylo Ren beside her swallows hard.

They clip the earthy moss as they land.

She flips the switch that releases the ramp. The smell of damp earth pervades the cockpit.

“I’m not ready,’ she murmurs.

“Okay,” he says.

* * *

 

He watches as she closes her eyes, evens her breathing.

“Rey?” he edges out.

“Shut up.”

He waits a few more moments until her eyes blink open.

“I feel unbalanced,” she murmurs under her breath.

He doesn’t know what to say; he always feels that way.

“What do I do?” she whispers.

“Typically, this is the point where I start destroying things with my saber.” 

She’s biting her lip, but she’s also laughing around it, the hiccupy gasps spiraling out of her control. And then he laughs with her until he can’t breathe either.

“I didn’t realize you had a sense of humor,” she says.

He shrugs. A quiet moment covers them.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be more ready,” she says.

“You don’t have to...”

“Yes, I do. It’s a Jedi Temple. How evil can it be?”

* * *

 

“Estimated time of arrival?” Leia asks of her pilot, Joph Seastriker.

“About forty minutes until we can fall into the planet’s orbit, and then we still have another twenty if you want to land on the surface.”

They have forty-five X-Wings tailing them. She knows it isn’t nearly enough to defeat the First Order. She can only hope Rey can defeat her son soon enough to send his troops into disarray.

And then she reminds herself that that man is not her son any more.

* * *

 

Finn’s screaming.

Rationally, he knows that is not what he should be doing. There are probably giant creatures hiding in the mountain rocks ready to pounce on him.

But Poe...

He fell. And Finn heard the sick thump of his body hitting the rocks.

His screaming shifts into a long string of shouted expletives as he looks down the side of the cliff. The rocks shift beneath Poe’s immobile form. A stream of red leaks from his right hip.

“Shit, shit, shit,” Finn mutters, searching his pockets for a pair of gloves. Maybe, impossibly, he left his gloves in these pants...

He pulls out one sole glove, the index finger torn off.

It will have to do. Better than shredding his hands climbing down the cliff face.

He hears Poe moan from  those several meters below. He swallow hard.

And hopes he doesn’t join his friend in a heap on the ground.

* * *

 

“Release them,” Hux says. And eighty-five evac ships drop into Ahch-To’s atmosphere.

And for once, he too prepares for imminent battle.

He jumps and several seconds later his parachute deploys. 

He will find Kylo Ren.

* * *

 

Rey’s feet quiver as she walks up the jagged stairs. She feels the sheer power beneath the stones, coursing into her.

“Why is it in ruins?” she asks him.

“I don’t think this temple has been used for Jedi training in centuries.”

“But shouldn’t it be protected from natural occurrences? Shouldn’t the Force-”

“The Force doesn’t work that way,” he says, clipped, stopping her short.

“Then how does it work? If you know everything.”

He shoots her a hard look. 

She rolls her eyes, and quickens her pace so as not to look at him. The asshole.

And at the top, she stops, pauses, feels the space around her so much more acutely, she stretches her fins tilts back her head, lets the rumbling breeze ruffle her skin.

She feels his fingers on his shoulder, soft, gentle, but imbued with power.

This power.

She turns to him. And where she can take it in, hold the power inside her without it tearing her apart, he struggles. She takes his hand, hoping to calm his erratic breathing. His face contorts, and it occurs to her that he might not find comfort in her touch. That her touch before suggested lust or hate.

“What do you want?” she asks, somehow both aloud and toward his consciousness.

And she knows he thinks it unfair of her to ask that. She more or less expects the tears that fall from his dark eyes. She squeezes his hand and moves to pull away from him.

“Don’t let go,” he pleads. He claps her fingers tightly. “Help me.”

It’s still there, the darkness that clouds his mind.

But the pitiful expression clouding his face breaks her.

She holds tighter, letting his instability hover on her consciousness.

* * *

 

Finn’s hands tremble as he descends the cliff face.

Poe’s moans grow quieter below him until they die off.

Hopefully.

Hopefully, he only passed into unconsciousness.

Finn won’t consider the other alternative.

He glances down. Not as bad of an idea as rumor suggests.

Until he realizes that the world appears to sway beneath him.

He whips his head back up.

Takes a few deep breaths.

Lowers his foot, gently, gently...

Until unstable solidity cradles his feet.

“Poe?” he coaxes. 

Poe’s limp form doesn’t answer.

* * *

 

Rey leads him, their hands still tightly wound together, down a set of stony steps, descending into a dark cavern.

She pulls the blue saber from her belt, using it to illuminate the path before them. They walk for awhile in subtle silence, cloaked by the thick darkness and the glow of her saber.

And then.

In the distance.

A green light. It emanates from far away. Rey squeezes his hand. Flicks off her saber.

“Wait,” he says.

“What?” she says.

He kisses her.

He fumbles for a moment in the darkness, his lips skimming the corner of her mouth, slowly kissing his way so their lips align. She trembles as his lips skim her shivering skin. He kisses her upper lip, coaxing her mouth open.

Her fingers tighten around his before she kisses him back, slow and steady.

She pulls away.

“Are you alright?”

With his cheek pressed against hers, he nods.

She urges him forward so their footsteps echo as they walk.

Until they enter into a cavern.

And his jaw drops.

* * *

 

Leia’s panic grows.

Finn and Poe have yet to make contact.

But she has to go in.

Even if she must sacrifice everything. She must save her brother.

* * *

 

 

The green light glows so brightly around them that he has to squint so his eyes will adjust.

“What is this?” Rey asks in blind awe.

It looks like moss, crawling up the cavern walls, hanging in ethereal stalactites, curling around the expanses of stone. He reaches out, letting his fingers brush the strange glow.

A surge of the Force passes through him, simultaneously powerful and calming.

“Midichlorians,” he murmurs. “A colony of midichlorians.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a review! They are super valuable!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Friends, I’m finally back! I know it’s been way too long, but somehow life always tends to get in the way of writing. A quick recap from where we left off: The First Order and the Rebellion both have armies coming for Ahch-To, Poe has been gravely injured, and Rey and Kylo just stumbled across a colony of midichlorians in the Jedi Temple...
> 
> Chapter song recommendation: “Monster,” Imagine Dragons.

Finn trembles so hard that his muscles ache. He bites the inside of his cheek, trying to stave off the fear. He tumbles in his satchel for his med-kit, yanking it from underneath his sleeping bag. Pops the plastic open, not even sure yet what he needs. Desperately, he tries to recall the emergency procedures to resuscitate, but his brain is so clouded with fear, he can't think.

He decides he needs to see the damage, and carefully rolls Poe over. It's then that Poe groans, the tortured sound making the wound in his side appear even worse.

Finn sees it and promptly looks away. He then swears loudly.

The skin is shredded. Finn can't even tell how deep it goes; Poe bleeds too profusely to gain any insight to what's underneath.

He breathes in to settle his stomach.

And with trembling fingers, rifles through the med-kit.

* * *

 

“Why...?” she breathes, the enchantment still blooming on her face.

As the dread collects on his.

Her fingers trace the glowing stalactites of midichlorians.

He shrugs in response to her question. “Maybe the fungus down here allows them to reproduce more easily. As symbiotes, they need an organism off which to grow.”

“Are they... are they good or evil?”

Why does she keep asking him? Like he knows.

“They are neutral. Like the Force itself.” 

The power in the air intoxicates him, heady and beautiful. He’s afraid to breathe for fear it will consume him. He doesn’t understand how she can touch them without succumbing...

“We need to leave,” he says.

“What?”

“Now.”

Her eyebrows wrinkle with her confusion. “You were the one who wanted to come to the temple in the first place.” And there’s a slight accusatory note in the way her voice lilts at the end.

“And now I want to leave.”

* * *

 

Hux’s feet hit the rocks with a sharp thud.

He unhooks his parachute, discarding it dramatically behind him, letting it flutter down the cliff face.

His boots crunch against the rocks as he makes his way up the the rendezvous point. He can’t wait for this.

He pulls out his radio. “Kill anything that moves.”

“Aye, sir,” comes a reply.

* * *

 

Finn looks up in the sky cautiously. 

The figures drop like a plague of insects. They must be First Order; the Resistance isn’t slated to arrive yet. His fingers shake as he threads the needle through Poe’s skin, blood dribbling through the messy seam. He dabs at it with the cloth, staining the fabric red with each pass.

“C’mon, Poe,” he grits through his clenched jaw. “We can’t let them catch us. We... we gotta get through this together.”

He takes another brief look at the sky, unnerved by the closeness of the descending threat.

* * *

 

Rey’s quiet for a long moment.

“Why do you want to leave?” she asks him again.

“It’s time to go.”

She resists clenching her fists and ramming them into his face. “You already said that.”

“This isn’t useful,” he says, waving toward the midichlorians.

She raises her eyebrows.

“I’m no experienced Force user, and even I know that this is immeasurable power. I don’t buy your shit. Try again, Kylo.”

He looks away from her stubbornly.

She knows she shouldn’t, but she reaches out with her mind, drawing on the the amplified power of the Force in the cavern to push past his mental barriers.

She can’t catch much as his thoughts race. They spin and tumble, and she tries to reach in, to stop them from tearing him apart, but she fears that without his permission she;ll be shredded herself.

_ “Let me help you.” _

_ “Leave me alone!”  _ And with extraordinary power (he too must have taken advantage of the excess of midichlorians), he pushes her out. It takes her breath away, and she doubles over panting, her eyes downcast as his face contorts in pain.

“Do you see what you’ve done to me? What you made me do?”

“No! I don’t understand! You are so fucking bipolar. I don’t know what you want, Kylo! Please tell me before I inadvertently set you off again!”

“I can’t-” he says, his voice breaking.

“You can’t tell me?”

“I can’t fall to it again.”

* * *

 

“Will all due respect, General Organa, I need you to make a decision,” her pilot, Joph Seastriker says. “I can’t hold this position for too much longer without draining our fuel. Hovering just out of orbit like this take a lot of juice.”

“I know, I know,” she says, impatiently.

She presses her lips together. The radio silence from Finn and Poe means that they have no idea where to descend. They could arrive on the wrong side of the planet and their reinforcement could be useless.

“General?”

“Give me a minute.”

Joph watches her expectantly. 

She runs her up the front of her scalp, smoothing out the flyaways. “Do we know where the First Order sent their soldiers.”

“I can do a calculation of their trajectory and send our boys on the same path.”

“Okay. And Joph?”

“Yeah?”

“They’re girls too.”

* * *

 

It’s not working.

The gash is too big, the thread he’s using to patch it up too small. His hands shake.

He hears the crunching of footsteps far off, but approaching closer. He pours more water from his canteen over the wound, trying to flush the oozing blood away. It’s starting to clot near the surface, but it’s not enough.

Poe groans.

“Hold on, Dameron. You’ve got to fucking hold on,” Finn grits out at him, but he’s pretty sure Poe’s too far gone to understand anything happening.

The footsteps behind him grow closer, and Finn knows they’re fucked. It doesn’t matter what he does, they’ll both be shot before he can save Poe.

At least it will put Poe out of his misery...

He runs his fingers through the wisps of hair over Poe’s forehead.

The footstep stop behind him. Finn tenses. From under his breath, he grumbles, “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.” Reaches for the blaster at his waist.

“W ell, well,” says an unexpectedly soft voice. “Who do we have here?”

* * *

 

It.

Feels.

So.

Fucking.

Good.

The extra surge of the Force thrumming through his skin. The power welling inside him like a wave growing before it crashes on the shore.

Her hands caress his, opening his palms, smoothing out his fingers.

“Kylo?”

How... How is she able...

“Look at me,” she demands.

...able to resist?

His eyelids lift.

“I need you to talk to me,” she pleads. 

_ “No.” _ He slips his thoughts into hers. 

_ “Kylo Ren. You need to relax. I... I know this is overwhelming-” _

_ “Overwhelming? No, no this bliss. This is everything I’ve ever wanted.” _

And he can see the realization falling over her face as his mind touches hers. How truly powerful he is. How he could overtake her in a matter of moments.

“Kylo, you’re right. We should leave,” she says aloud, recoiling from him.

“ _ Why the change of heart? Finally realizing that I’m a monster?” _

“I never said you weren’t.” She reaches for the saber at her belt. Her teeth pinch the edge of her lower lip.

_ “You want to fight, Little One?”  _ he sneers, still in her head.  _ “Let’s fight.” _

He feels her pull power from the midichlorians. A smirk tugs at the corner of his lips.

He unsheathes his own saber.

* * *

 

Hux did not expect it to be so damn windy on this planet.

He wraps his cloak tighter around him and internally curses at the idiot storm troopers they sent with him. He hasn’t been able to make contact with a single one.

Granted, that’s probably due to the fact that his radio was hit on the way down, but prefers to blame it on incompetence.

He stills his footsteps. Hears a vague moaning sound over the other side of a tall ridge. Like the sound of something dying.

He scales the side, cursing the damp puddles that make it impossible for his shoes to find holds in the rock.

He supposes an incapacitated storm trooper is worse than no storm trooper at all.

* * *

 

Finn turns his head toward the figure that’s approached from behind him.

And then.

To his utter disbelief.

Luke Skywalker. His Jedi robes billowing dramatically in the wind. 

Finn’s mouth opens until he realizes he has nothing to say.

“Your friend does not seem to be doing well.”

Finn looks back to Poe. Flips his head back to Luke. “Leia sent us,” he says awkwardly and probably too late.

Luke nods. Moves to Poe’s other side. “Did you use bacta patches?”

“I... tried, but the gash was so large, so I used a few, but I also tried for a few stitches and...”

Luke’s hand goes to the side of Poe’s body, just above the wound.

And slowly, every so slowly, the bleeding congeals. 

And the skin, it crawls back up Poe’s side.

Luke pauses, scanning Poe’s face, waiting. 

Until Poe blinks his eyes open.

* * *

 

She’s gripping her saber too tightly.

But the look in his eyes is maniacal, hungry.

She throws hasty walls over her mind to block him out. Even just for a minute.

She needs to figure out how to get him out of here.

Out of this beautiful, terrible place.

She ignites her saber, and the room floods with blue.

And with a smirk, he shrouds himself in red light.

And then she is thrown backward, her back slamming against the wall of the cave. She thinks she hears something in her arm crack, and flares of pain lick up the side of her shoulder. She gasps for breath.

“What did you think I was?” he snarls. “Did you just think you could just waltz in and turn me back to the Light.”

She closes her eyes, letting the surrounding power flow through her, abating the pain. “I never wanted you for the Light. And I’ve already fucking told you that.” She swallows, letting the energy propel her through his pressure holding her down. She swings at him, cut off when his saber parries back.

“You wanted it. You wanted to make me love you and just turn my back on everything I’ve worked for.” His face is close to hers, only separated by the flare of their lightsabers.

“You were the one who showed up on this island! You were the one determined to kill me! I never wanted any part in this. I certainly never wanted you to fall in love with me.”

He barks a laugh. “I’m not in love with you. I want to kill you.”

She pushes all her weight to the side, stepping around his his attempt to parry. His saber catches hers from underneath, throwing them into a quick series of attack and counterattack. She knows she can’t beat him in a feat of strength, not with his Force sensitivity enhanced, not with his mind verging on insanity.

But maybe...

Maybe...

She side steps him, letting him overpower her, letting their duel slip backwards. Letting his arrogance propel him.

And then she runs.

Is it stupid and cowardly? Probably.

But she runs out of the cavern.

And if he wants to defeat her, he’ll have to leave this place too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! I’m not entirely sure where I’m going to take this story. I have two resolution plot arcs in mind, one that’s two chapters and one that’s six, but I haven’t decided which to use yet. Please review! I’d love to hear your thoughts about this chapter and what you’d like to see from the next one!


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